I was born on August 25th, 1947 (unless you go by my actual birth certificate--but that is another story). On the day that I was born my family consisted of a mother, father and two grandmothers, two grandfathers and five great grandparents. I had 4 biological aunts and four biological uncles and three aunts by marriage. On my fathers side there were 4 cousins. On my mothers side I was the one and only grandchild until my brother came along 5 and a half years later. Jackie was the apple of my life and I mothered him constantly. Needless to say I felt pretty special and was spoiled especially by my special Aunt Carole---who continues to always be there for me. Within the next six years after my birth there was a total of 10 cousins. Back in those days a play date consisted of Sunday Dinner at my grandmothers house and romping in the yard with the cousins. Today those cousins who were so close seldom see one another except at the rare wedding and less rare funeral. No grandparents are left--no parents--and only 3 biological aunts and one biological uncle. One of my biggest family losses was my cousin Jolene, who was more like a sister. She was 11 months younger than me and my mother was also her babysitter. I will talk more about Jolene in the future. This was chapter one of Family.
Chapter two begins as the second round of cousins started coming along, including my sister, Jodi who was born 21 years after me. There was an entire crop of cousins for her to share her childhood with along with second cousins. Not only was our family growing but it was also decreasing as losses occured much too frequently. It is a funny thing about families---some you are born with and others are acquired through marriage. Even my grandmother remarried and brought an entire large family into our lives.
Chapter three began when I chose a man to spend the rest of my life with and now my nuclear family included the Benson family. We now had the Benson and the Prudens and all that they brought with them. Although our marriage was in 1970---our real family began in 1977 with our beautiful baby boy, Joshua Lafe. During those 7 years that we were married without children we always had my sister who was two when we were married. We practiced parenting on her. Brittany was born in 1980 and our family was complete. In 2005 Jodi had the most beautiful child we had seen in a long time. He has been the sunshine of our life for the past 3 and a half years. We are practicing our grandparenting skills on him. In 2008 both Brittany(George Cobb) and Lafe(Jennifer Scott) were married and our family has taken on a whole new life. I think we may even become real grandparents someday and just like with my baby sister and parenting---I can't imagine it being any more special than our relationship with Reed.
My grandmother and her family were quilters and every time I think of families I think of patchwork quilts. Each person adds their own unique fabric to the family. Some people have memories that are called upon by smells, or other senses. My memories will always be reminiscent of fabrics. I was sewing doll clothes by the time I was three, I think. My grandmother always could always find me some "terial" as I used to call material. Unfortunately, I got the sewing out of my system by the last sewing course in college. I still love the fabric , but have no real desire to stitch it together. I especially love how we choose friends to become a part of our quilt of life. Just as we need winter fabric, summer fabric, fancy fabric, denim and leather---we find friends along the way that are just what we need forever or for a season. Don't ever forget the work family of friends that you share a large portion of your life with.
My definition of a family is a group of people united together by blood, chance or by choice to create satisfaction down deep in your soul.
I will talk about Jolene in the future
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